I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
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