There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize