If that was your dad, he is hot
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
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can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
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She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize