I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
This house was built for laser tag.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
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Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
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It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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