After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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