I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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