first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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