Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
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