Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
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