she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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