At least make sure they are 18
Why
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Randomize