youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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