Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
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