please come you make the beer taste better
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize