We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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