WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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