Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize