You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
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