She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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