This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Use "feeling words"
Yay
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize