I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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