I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize