halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize