Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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