I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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