everyone is single if you try hard enough
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
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Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
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I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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