Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize