Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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