i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize