I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize