now i know why i became what i already was.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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