The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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