between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Randomize