and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize