I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
YAS. BRING CRAB.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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