im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
Randomize