i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
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We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
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He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
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