Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm going to jail i love you
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize