We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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