kristin has been a bad kristin
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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