Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
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