the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
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