As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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