im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
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and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
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What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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