whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
My friends, they love my intelligence
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
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