She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
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My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
The beers last night were like the tears from god
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
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How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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