there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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