Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Randomize