marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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