she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
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Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
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Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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